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Reducing Wedding Stress

February 5, 2014

Since this is a safe place, I wanted to share something…

Reducing Wedding Stress

I plan events for a living, and rarely do I feel stressed, overwhelmed or restless. But once in a while, I am overcome with a wave of nausea thinking about the “wedding” that we are planning. It’s never one to-do in particular, it’s always the over arching view of everything that needs to be done, that could be getting done, that we are waiting on, the money, the thoughts and building ideas. The stress comes from a need for perfection, that is both endearing and impossible. This particular stress can only be found in the bride, as the groom sits planning his bachelor party with his friends (as much as he is trying to be helpful), as the family offers suggestions and plans as much as they can.

Because I am not the only one, the only bride who wants every table styled perfectly, every pie tasting like a breath of summer, every song to bring an emotion to your best friend, I thought it was be fun (and relaxing) to think about the things I do to calm myself. Reducing Wedding Stress

+Communicate. What I quickly learned was that the more you communicate; with your fiancé, your mothers, your sisters, your vendors; the more apt you are to be your relaxed self. No one can read your mind as a bride (and vice versa), if you do not like something, say it. If you think a price is unfair, find another vendor. Be open, be honest.

+Sleep. More than anything, rest. Rest when you’re tired and rest when you are not. You are most likely working a full-time job, managing every day life responsibilities, managing relationships and planning a huge party for people who mean everything to you. Stop thinking about it and close your eyes. (7-9 hours, please.)

+Pin. Stop pinning wedding ideas and pin anything else. Pin funny pictures, pin kittens and vacations and sunshine and gardens. Pin the whole new J. Crew catalogue; it will take your mind away from the wedding for whatever small moment you have.

+Exercise. Proven over and over: exercise reduces stress. It is as simple as 20-30 minutes a day — a long walk, a slight jog, a Pilates class. Whatever feels right for you, just go do it.

+Read. To me, reading takes me far away from New York, from home. It arouses my imagination and sparks creativity. Reading makes me feel like I can do anything, melting all my stress and insecurity away.

+Drink Tea + Eat Healthy. More than coffee, drink tea. And water. Constantly consume water, first thing in the morning, last thing at night and 8 more times in between. Fill your diet with color: green, orange, purple, yellow. Whole foods that are plant-based keep you safe from feeling heavy and give you loads of energy.

+Burn Incense + Buy Some Flowers. Close your eyes and breathe in soft scents. Meditate for a few minutes daily, and for that short time, stop thinking about your stressor. Count, if that allows you to release.

+Write. This is it for me: writing. I’m not the best at communicating or pushing to get my way. But I can write, my thoughts, my feelings, my stress. Sometimes the simple act of writing it down immediately allows me to notice how silly it actually is. Automatic relaxation.

+Pamper + Laugh. Get your nails done, get your hair cut, eat that donut (every once in a while). Hang out with friends who make you laugh. The ones who make you laugh hard.

+Stay Centered. After all, the party you are planning is a celebration of your love. Know the deeper meaning of the day: professing your love to God and to the people in your life who nurtured you to this point. Stick with your fiancé all the way through it.

It’s too much fun to let stress consume you, so brush it off. I already feel better… thanks for listening.

Reducing Wedding Stress

theshellhammer

 

{Top photo via; middle via 99Roots}

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