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Weekends in Ohio vs. Weekends in New York

August 6, 2012

Ohio:

Leave work at 6:00 pm, grab 1 drink with your co-worker, drive home, change into ripped jeans and a v-neck t-shirt, grab a 9:00 pm dinner, head home in exhaustion, set alarm for 9:00 am, wake up, watch Serena win gold, flip through the new Ikea Catalogue, pretend you have the time and money to redecorate your 1,000 sq. foot apartment (and the motivation), put the catalogue down, change into your work out gear, go for a short run, pretend like it’s a dramatic marathon, come home, take a shower, ignore your hair in the humidity, lounge around for a few hours watching Spanglish, pretend like you are going to clean, don’t clean, pretend like you are going to do your hair, let it frizz, get invited to dinner last-minute, realize your hair is frizz and know you will need an hour and water to tame, decline dinner but decide to meet for drinks later, start getting cramps, lie down for another hour as dinner goes on, take 45 minutes to tame the beast, show up for the last bite of dinner as a headache ensues, know this is not where you want to be, listen to the conversation about past co-workers you never met nor care about, put on a smile when talking about France but only because you are dreaming about cheese, listen to your stomach grumble, regret not eating dinner, blame your hair and the humidity and your boyfriend and your cramps and your headache, go get a vodka/cranberry because you need alcohol quickly to calm your hormones or something like that, drink it quickly, tell your friends you don’t want to go dancing, know that they are disappointed in your mood, don’t care because you are typically a happy person but today is just not your day, leave the empty bar wondering if you are the reason everyone wants to go home (probably), drive home in silence, set alarm for 9:00 am, pretend to fall asleep in bed, move to the couch instead, finish 50 Shades of Grey at 3:00 am after 6 months of reading it (and not liking it), fall asleep to a muted infomercial, wake up at 9:00 am, watch Federer struggle for 2 sets, change into work out gear, go to the gym, watch Federer win silver, come home, take a shower, go to the grocery store, make burgers, lounge around for a few hours, fall asleep to Spanglish (again), wake up, make pizza, watch the Olympics, go to bed.

New York:

Leave work at 6:00 pm, grab 1 drink with your co-worker, drive take the subway home, change into ripped jeans and a v-neck t-shirt black skinny jeans and a blouse, grab a 9:00 pm dinner, head home in exhaustion, set alarm for 9:00 am, wake up, watch Serena win gold, flip through the new Ikea Catalogue, pretend you have the time and money to redecorate your 1,000 600 sq. foot apartment (and the motivation), put the catalogue down, change into your work out gear, go for a short run, pretend like it’s a dramatic marathon, come home, take a shower, ignore your hair in the humidity, lounge around for a few hours watching Spanglish, pretend like you are going to clean, don’t clean, pretend like you are going to do your hair, let it frizz, get invited to dinner last-minute, realize your hair is frizz and know you will need an hour and water to tame, decline dinner but decide to meet for drinks later, start getting cramps, lie down for another hour as dinner goes on, take 45 minutes to tame the beast, show up for the last bite of dinner as a headache ensues, know this is not where you want to be, listen to the conversation about past co-workers you never met nor care about, put on a smile when talking about France but only because you are dreaming about cheese, listen to your stomach grumble, regret not eating dinner, blame your hair and the humidity and your boyfriend and your cramps and your headache, go get a vodka/cranberry because you need alcohol quickly to calm your hormones or something like that, drink it quickly, tell your friends you don’t want to go dancing, know that they are disappointed in your mood, don’t care because you are typically a happy person but today is just not your day, leave the empty bar wondering if you are the reason everyone wants to go home (probably), drive walk home in silence, set alarm for 9:00 am, pretend to fall asleep in bed, move to the couch instead, finish 50 Shades of Grey at 3:00 am after 6 months of reading it (and not liking it), fall asleep to a muted infomercial, wake up at 9:00 am, watch Federer struggle for 2 sets, change into work out gear, go to the gym, watch Federer win silver, come home, take a shower, go to the grocery store, make burgers, lounge around for a few hours, fall asleep to Spanglish (again), wake up, make pizza, watch the Olympics, go to bed.

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